Jackie Chan meme

It’s here, it’s here, it’s finally here… said absolutely nobody upon hearing the Vertu Ti will hit the ground running in Singapore this week. Remember the monstrosity? We’re trying hard to forget about it, but it still haunts us sometimes in our worst nightmares.

It’s not that the phone is ugly, has yesterday’s software and last year’s specs. But it’s all that and terribly expensive. And we don’t mean that in a Galaxy S4 $800 unlocked kind of way. Instead, the atrocity is going to run you a cool 10,000 bucks at the absolute cheapest.

That’s in the US, with Singapore pricing kicking off at S$13,000 for the “Titanium Black Leather” model. The “Titanium Pure Black” is going to be S$15,000, the “Titanium Black Alligator” S$2,000 extra and the top of the line “Black PVD Titanium Red Gold Mixed Metals” a total of S$27,000. Translated into US dollars, that ranges from $10,500 to $21,700. Ridiculous!

Vertu Ti

Hong Kong is due to get the Vertu Ti soon after Singapore, with the rest of the world left out from this first wave of releases. Bummer (not!).

If you happened to miss Ti’s unveiling and haven’t had a good laugh in a while, here’s a rundown of the fellow’s specs – 3.7-inch 800 x 480 pix res display, dual-core 1.7 GHz CPU, Android 4.0 ICS, 8 MP rear-facing camera, 1 GB of RAM, 64 GB of internal memory, microSD support and Bang & Olufsen stereo speakers. We kid you not.

But you know what the sad thing is? Some people are actually going to buy this. Maybe only 100 or so around the world, but still. Which is not sad, it’s downright preposterous. You know how many Xperia Zs you could get for the price of one Ti piece of junk? Enough to keep one for yourself and give one to each Android Authority team member. There, isn’t that a better idea?