Picture this: you are having a nice romantic dinner, or it’s time to spend a free day with your loved one, and find yourself mostly talking to a person that has his/her face so sunk into their phones you feel like the Titanic song is about to start playing.
But this one is not a sweet feeling. Instead, you are left wanting to grab that phone, break it in half (like the same ship) and maybe make a close-by puddle its new wreckage site. Surely, it’s an annoying habit to many. And it doesn’t only happen between couples; I’ve seen plenty of friendships affected by this phenomena.
Before we can start trying to work on a solution for “Phubbing” (phone snubbing), it has to become an official thing, and we believe the latest research coming from the Hankamer School of Business of Baylor University has just done that.
After surveying 453 Americans, it was found that too many people are victims to Phubbing. Unlucky for those of us who may do it, it doesn’t end up in good news for phone snubbing fans. Almost half of the subjects accepted their partners are known to focus way too much on their smartphones. 22.6% say it has, indeed, caused conflicts, while about 37% claim to have felt depressed in the relationship, at least some of the time.
By the way, Phubbing doesn’t only include pulling out your smartphone and going through it during your candle-lit dinner. Respondents also address annoying moments in which a partner conveniently places his/her phone in a visible location during their bonding times. You know… just in case something important enough shows up. Or he/she may even pull it out during the slower moments of the date.
And the issue here may not exactly be that people have an unforgivable phone addiction. It’s more about the implications these acts have. Think about it – to a partner, this simply means that there are way too many things in your life that can be more important than that precious relationship you two hold.
“What we discovered was that when someone perceived that their partner phubbed them, this created conflict and led to lower levels of reported relationship satisfaction. These lower levels of relationship satisfaction, in turn, led to lower levels of life satisfaction and, ultimately, higher levels of depression.” -A. Roberts, researcher at Hankamer School of Business of Baylor University
Is there a good Phubbing balance?
Now, here’s the real question. Is there a level of phubbing that could become acceptable in modern society? After all, smartphones really are an important part of our lives, and maybe there are ways to adopt these handy gadgets in a healthy fashion!
I have always said that technology is like a weapon, or any dangerous tool. A smartphone can be the best investment you have ever made, but you must know how to operate it properly, efficiently and safely. As it goes with anything, it’s also easy to get addicted to our smartphones and forget about common courtesy.
I believe there is definitely a balance we can reach, and that is really what I strive for. There are definitely times when I disconnect and put all my attention on my friends and romantic partners. But then I also really want to post that Instagram picture showcasing the delicious steak we are having! Candle light makes for awesome shots, after all.
I believe the clue is to include her in the fun. You know, just don’t overdo it.
Are you a phone snubber?
So, here’s the moment of truth. Are you affected by phubbing? Maybe you are the phubber. What do you think about this new phenomenon? Does it annoy the hell out of you, or do you think a little phubbing is acceptable? Hit the comments and share your thoughts!